Even with a Bad Knee

 

It was two months ago, while attending mass a voice suddenly told me “pag-lector” (be a lector). My mother, my sister and my sister-in-law are all serving as lectors and I have somehow managed to dodge all of my mother’s invitation to serve as a lector before. For some reasons the idea of being a lector never enamored me until that time in October.

November 30, 2020 – was the installation of new lectors. It came at a convenient time for me. And it seemed like I was meant to actually be a lector this time around. And so I heed the call. With the pandemic, most senior lectors and young lectors can’t serve due to their 24-hours curfew so I immediately got a regular Thursday schedule at dawn which was perfect for the vampiric me. And I was given schedules for the Misa de Gallo which I looked forward to.

But being a servant of God you’d really be faced with trials here and there. Aside from my stomach tumbling while I wait for my turn and the fear of committing mistakes while reading the word of God, I was tested with my health. I’ve recently found out I have hypermobile joints meaning my joints are very mobile and is prone to dislocating. And I found this out after three episodes of patellar subluxation, twice on the left which happened few months ago and one on the right which happened early this month. Patellar subluxation is an occurrence wherein my knee cap gets out of it’s normal position. It was really painful, my knee was swollen, I couldn’t walk properly for days. The recurrence alarmed my parents and so we booked an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon and was prescribed with anti-inflammatories and an exercise to help lessen the extra mobility and avoid more subluxation and possible dislocations.

I was able to do my first schedule of Misa de Gallo and was planning for my boyfriend’s birthday celebration when my right knee subluxated once more. Maybe because my right knee hasn’t fully healed at that time which made it worse this time that I even had to ask my brothers to carry me to bed. I had to cancel the birthday date that I looked forward to and was sort bedridden for the next three days and attended the other days of Misa de Gallo online. I had to rest up and heal for me not to miss my other schedule which is on the 24th.

I never blamed God though. I did feel sad about my pain. I felt like a burden to everyone around me who had to serve me from assisting me to the bathroom, bringing me food and even handing me my phone. I didn’t want to worry my parents even more than they’ve already have so I just welcomed all the help that was offered to me. Growing up, I was pretty much independent with most of my business. So my parents and siblings told me that this would be the time where I get to be dependent and rely on them which was pretty warming and comforting.

It was sad that I could only video call the boyfriend for his birthday and send him a cake. But I appreciate how understanding he is and how much he cares about me. We rescheduled our date until walking was no longer painful. But before I went on a date with the boyfriend, I first went out to serve as a lector. 

I donned my white garb and with a knee support I walked the aisle albeit awkward and nervous, I drew the courage and stood on the lectern and offered my voice to preach the word of God. And it felt really gratifying to be an instrument of God in spreading His word. Yet again, this served as lesson for me that I don’t need to do things on my own and that I have to always be humble. I have my whole family who’s always ready to come to my rescue. And I’m pretty sure the Lord is preparing all of us for something greater and what’s happening is part of His plan of shaping me up for what I ought to be - an instrument of God’s love.

🦋